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April 4th, 2010

I Got Down Low Today

Late this afternoon I visited my grandmother. As I approached her door, I saw that there was a small bird directly in its nook. I could not open her door. I stepped closer, the bird tried to take flight in all its fear of me but this bird could not do so, it was broken, it’s wings would not work and no amount of its will would matter.

I got down low, I approached from an angle I thought induced the least panic in its heart and the bird got to the side in the leaves before I could make a difference, it would not let me close. Then it simply sat there stunned and staring at me. I took this bird’s photograph.

I went inside to be with my grandmother, all my thoughts couldn’t focus. My brain was filled with this bird, only this bird, there was nothing I could do; I could not will it well, I could not photograph it well, I could not tell it’s story well.

My visit was not long, minutes maybe. I stepped out the door and looked for where it had gone. In the first moments of not seeing it, I felt joy. Where had it gone, had it taken flight? Then, taking a few steps, I saw a peek of feather again. There it was. Lying motionless only feet from where it had been.

I got down low, I approached from an angle I thought induced the least panic. Before I was too close I pressed my lips softly together and gently blew the air from my lungs towards it. The leaves, the brush, the feathers, they all reacted to my air… This bird did not react to my wind, this bird was no longer stunned, this bird was no longer staring at me.

– – –

Inside my grandmother’s home, her couch still bloomed its red flower today. Inside my home here, my couch was still green today. Today was difficult. No amount of my will could change this.

Today was Easter.

3 Photographs | April 4, 2010