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October 1st, 2007

my pictures must really suck

maybe i just don’t realize this. that could maybe explain cold sending. i still do it, often, as my first job was a cold drop, never one since in 10 years, but still, giving up seems just as pointless, so out the door they go.

i use to think if your pics were interesting enough, the work would come, but the past year has really finally made me realize, short of being a complete moron with a camera (sometimes even then, the photogs that rely on assistants to understand their own light still makes me laugh, no, not even annie L level, but one pack/one light level), who you know is everything, nothing else really matters, or my pictures must really suck, i just don’t realize this. this is the only rational excuse for all the random drops i do meaning so little.

i just got my book back after over a month at a magazine. i called this magazine for 2 months before sending it over. i couldn’t get in to meet anyone, almost never do. i made sure it was a good week to drop it off, that everyone i wanted to see it was there that week, that it wasn’t a closing week, even got a day to drop it. after sending it, i never got the pe on the phone again, well, i did once, two weeks later, it still hadn’t been seen, ok, no problem, let me know when to pick it up. over the next 3 weeks, i called once a week to see if it had been looked at, not one call was ever answered or returned. i called randomly to try and catch the pe, no luck. ok, so i let it sit there another week, figuring at the very least, maybe it would eventually get seen or i’d just get a call to come get it as its in the way and they need room to stack the other 20 they must get everyday. that didn’t work either, so i just sent a messenger, i just got it back. i understand the world is too busy to not hire your buddy or that cute photog you met at a party, or chris or dan, but then why tell me to send it, what’s it take to look at book anyway, 30 seconds, too busy for 30 seconds? i could of let the book sit somewhere else for more then a month for them to maybe look at….

i like everyone else can tell if it’s been opened or not, this place usually leaves a note, so i was excited to have another form reject to add to the pile, yet nothing this time. the books had been rotated, so someone along the line must have at least opened it. but not one card of mine was taken, the 2 books were still in the same order, so it was opened, but prolly not looked through.

it did however have a unique smell inside the case. outside the case i understand, BO from the messenger maybe, whatever, i even got a delivery once that reeked of weed so bad, i almost got stoned from signing for it. but to smell inside my case, i’ll never figure that one out….


(some of the notes below were actually great to receive, some sucked to receive, but made me smile, these are older ones as the newer ones are awaiting other things….)