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June 24th, 2010

I Never Know How To Say Goodbye


15 Hours Before I Left #1RN

False Eyelashes, 8 Years After Being Stuck Down | #1RN | 2010

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I could see her shaking, feel it. It went faster then I thought and she was gone, I watched her go down the stairs and through the turnstile. Then she was gone. I stood there in disbelief, she couldn’t really be leaving New York City, it couldn’t be real, it really didn’t feel it. I had never been with someone so long.

I stood there a minute trying to soak it in.

I was down the stairs and through the turnstile before I knew what was happening. I walked as fast as I could without actually running, going through the mid-town crowd looking for her, she wouldn’t be hard to spot I thought to myself and just kept pushing through the crowd. Half way down the platform, there she was, standing looking at her feet and no longer crying. She saw me coming, smiled only the way she does when I surprise her and she asked me what I was doing. I didn’t say a word, I just grabbed her and I didn’t let go. The train came and she let go of me and got on. She didn’t invite me on and I didn’t step on.

The last time I talked to her before she got married, she asked me why I never chased her to where to she had moved to. I asked her why I wasn’t invited.